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The Day I found a cursed Devkit
Note: Grandma mistakes are intentional, as always. So don't mess with 'em, got that? Another Note: This story may contain some NSFW content or innuendos, so if you are under 13, please do not read this. I was a prototype collector. A job that took quite a lot of commitment to, especially when you could be dealing with a complete fake sometimes, and you might not know it, but it's interesting to see what changed in games. I also enjoyed collecting console development kits, or devkits. These helped the people develop games for the console, usually having more features than a retail console, coupled along with their confidentiality, made them quite a feat to collect. I had quite a lot, but I was missing one I yearned for. That one, you may ask? It was the Playstation One devkit. The PlayStation One devkit was a hard one to obtain. It couldn't be found easily, and when there was up for auction on eBay, usually some cunt beat me to it and burnt it. Literally, he recorded videos of burning these things. What a demonic BASTARD! But enough rambling, let's get on with the story. Later on, after massive digging, I found one on eBay for $10, for some reason. I instantly bought it without hesitating. I should have asked about the console first, not letting my recklessness get in the way. So I received the console a few millenniums later, by which I have already been dead. I opened the box to see the console and a note. The note said "FRICK." Shame on the seller for putting such an offensive word there. I plugged it in and turned it on. The console booted up and turned on a very early copy of Mega Man Legends. Boy, did I enjoy this game. It was very different. For one, Mega Man looked like a fricking untextured cookie. What the heck? But I played on. Once I got to Juno, the game froze and turned off automatically. I turned the system back on, only to see a scary skeletron with the words "YOU'VE BEEN SKELLYED" above it. It played a distorted version of the crazy bus music. This music made my ears bleed like if hell was shoved up my asshole. Needless to say, I died from stupidity that day. Literally. I'm a literal skeleton right now, and... YOU'VE BEEN SKELLYED :) Pre-Incident Reason for making the Pre-Incident: I feel like the story is a bit underdeveloped, and, personally, this is one of my favorites, so I'd like to expand upon this one. This is my memoir. Before I bought the PS One dev kit, I actually still was having tangles with strange games and how weird my life was. I had once had a tangle with a cursed SEGA Genesis cartridge, and it haunted me for quite some time, leading to all sorts of shenanigans. Even when I wasn't checking out strange games, weird things were happening to me. I was like a web of failure and insanity. Even when I tried to develop my own game, it didn't really spare me that easily from the wrath of lazy storytelling. Don't you think that the author put too much hyperlinks in this area? I also had some breaks with the fourth wall. This wall was so weird, it dictated most of the laws for me, but the 3rd, 2nd, and 1st wall did not exist. What was that all about? Lazy storytelling was prevalent all my life, and this is no different. Take it from me, and don't think I made up this story. Please... Also, if you're reading this, Sunky is coming to your house and is going to crawl into your window when you are asleep at 3 am. Just, remember, that you are going to die. You could be able to survive, but you must know who and what sunky is. Category:BCP Category:Troll pasta Category:Gamepasta Category:Pastas